Here is me rambling; in part this post is an elaboration of my poem from earlier this month.
I don't think I know how to process or understand hardship, and the more I listen to other people, the more I don't think they do either. Especially on a global scale. I am a happy youtube user, and I listen to a number of Vloggers. One such commentator who I really like, said that in our lifetime (he's 21) we had NEVER seen such massive destruction and death as in Haiti, and even, somewhat arrogantly said people were welcome to question him, though he was confident in his assertion.
But he is wrong. A pessimistic tally of the Tsunami killed over 320,000 people. That was 6 years ago. So, I think that's what I'm getting at. It's not that we should diminish Haiti at all, I have friends that are arriving there this evening, and the country is sorely in need of hands, feet, funds, prayers and miracles. But Haiti is going to take a long time to recover, and if we don't remember that as many people died 6 years ago, we're not going to stick it out in Haiti.
But this is not new, or bizarre, or anymore difficult than any other event in the last 6000 years of human history. And that's one of the problems that I see in postmodernity, is the fact that the emphasis on experience has led people to not believe in history. They comprehend it, that's easy. But the hundred years war, the plague, World War 2, we don't believe that people have suffered for forever. And not that we should give any ground retreat anyway from bearing the burdens of others, but, we need to be realistic that the world is broken. If you admit that, you will remember it, and you will become more and more convinced of the need to trust in God. Deepening trust in God changes our lives and our decisions, and if it doesn't, it's not real. That's where experience comes in to play. It's not about what happens to you, it's about what you make happen. I'm stuck here. That's okay. I'm praying for haiti and for all those who are able to go there. It's not just about haiti, it's about the whole world. I need to change.
I go back to this over and over again in my head: I love the story Don Miller tells in Blue Like Jazz, where he wants to go to war protests carrying a sign that says "I am the problem". Redemption starts where each person is, abject poverty, and utter need. I am a failure and a fraud, and I need grace to be authentic. I am haiti. I am the tsunami. And it gets worse when I realize my shipwreck is entirely self-inflicted. But I am being redeemed by something completely outside my metaphysical borders. It will take a lifetime for me to be right. Don't give up on me yet, Jesus. Everyday is remembering and starting over.
