Dao of Faith

I have been unaware for a while, that I have used a lot of zen and daoist tendencies in pursuing my faith. Now, before I get into whether that's right or wrong, I do want to promote the idea that there are paths of agreement, and traces of truth in systems of belief that may as a whole promote a false doctrine or an errant way of percieving reality. Perhaps this is the greatest form of deception to misuse truth, but, they're there, just like imbedded myths that anticipation redemption in various cultures, and so, just cause I borrow a term from another religion, doesn't mean I'm wrong in applying that principle as it is already very much a part of my belief system. The difference between syncretism and orthodoxy is essentially the same as intellectual property laws, in that pre-existent notions are not violations.

But a couple people have pointed out that various ideas, like catharsis, and identity reduction are things I have dwelt on and used in the expression of my faith.

Catharsis is Philippians 2:6-11, just cause that word appeared in the english language in a totally non-christian context doesn't mean it's a mislabeling of what Christ went through, and maybe in true postmodern form, we need to tweek or update, or add to the definition to enhance a more basic form. Maybe when we tie the idea of catharsis to a critical Christological passage, we are making an intellectual and spiritual upgrade, and drawing closer to a honest and practical theology.

For a while I really believed that I shouldn't cling to personal preference. I looked at various passages, like Philippians 2:12-13, but mostly observed various snobbish behaviors in the church, and decided, I shouldn't care about things that don't matter eternally.

Social Experiments

I've often said that my life is just one big social experiment, and so I thought I would document this. Most of my life I have not been in a relationship, and so I am fascinated by the drama and the nature of perception, especially in the internet age, so, naturally this was my chosen area of research.

#1 I publish on Facebook that me and a female who is just friend are in a relationship

#2 I publish on Facebook that I am dating someone, and it is actually true

#3 I meet someone from a Craigslist personal ad after searching the word "christian"

#4 I participate in a dating match website

#5 I experience a long-distance relationship based on a summer fling

#6 I casually date multiple women

#7 I participate in another dating match website

#8 I sustain a long-term relationship

#9 I go against every lesson I have learned thus far

Tebow & Me

I was watching the highlights of the Bronco's game yesterday, and thinking about Tim Tebow. I've had a couple discussions recently about the similarities between America and Rome, and the nature of the mob. The public loves to create and establish heroes, and the latest trend has really been to create heroes and then to destroy them, and see them laid to waste. Guys like Tiger Woods. The media wants to do everything they can to put strong good-looking americans on the front of Wheaties boxes. Then TMZ wants to tell everyone that it's actually not Wheaties, but a cocktail of steroids, heroin, and horse tranquilizer.

Then there's Tim Tebow. As an outspoken evangelical devoid the Michelle Bachmann whack-job theology, or an Osteen-esque prosperity matrix, I like Tim Tebow. As one of the greatest college quarterback careers of all time, I like him even better. I'm non-plussed by his pro career so far, but his tenacity mixed with the right circumstances and style of offense, certainly yields some headline making results.

I follow Skip Bayless on twitter, a Tebow Supporter and ESPN pundit, and he's always quick to point out that Tebow has what it takes to be a pro quarterback, given the right circumstances, personnel and strategy around him. I agree with that. He's also quick to point out the polarizing power of Tebow, and the hordes of anti-Tebow sentiment, often with incredulity.

But I think I get it, I think he was America as a college quarterback, with a squeaky clean image, and people want him to be a bust, they want him to be Ryan Leaf. Ryan Leaf might be worthless under center, but he's infamous. Every draft day they show that clip of him yelling like a 5-year-old at a locker room journalist. Celebrity tabloid world is just human nascar, waiting to erupt.

I'm not really going where you think I might be, but I do hope Tebow illustrates overcoming, and redemption, I hope he stays the course, and stays humble, and is always willing to admit his wrongs and his mistakes, and for all the right reasons too. I think his interviews betray an indomitable will based on his belief system, that anything is possible, but you have to get in there and keep trying, doing, reacting.

I believe that God, as much as he cares about our past and the things we've done, cares way more about the choices in front of us. Something i have learned from the bible is that GOd accounts for our wrongdoing, our mistakes, but his willingness to redeem comes with an opportunity to make a better choice the next time. The mystery of God's sovereignty is that it is all about his glory through our choices.

But, on a much lighter note, tonight, as I was thinking about one of my favorite subjects, romantic relationships, I made a connection to the world's perception of Tebow. This is totally non-linear. But, I am like Tim Tebow vs. the Dolphins when it comes to relationships. No matter how many false starts and fumbles, incompletions, and misperceptions of the defense I have made, my commitment is to getting better, taking it one day at a time, and hopefully having a really spectacular 4th quarter. It holds true one step forward in that, I don't look or act like someone that is the prototype for the position I want to play. I might not have the ideal skillset, or be able to contribute in a flashy way. There are always people willing to dismiss me, but I also have a number of fans that encourage me along the way, and hope that I will succeed. Like Tebow's fans, they are powerless to help me, and I'll only ever have success if I forget the emotional toll that the first 3 quarters have taken, and get back out there ready to play.

In the words of Hank Williams, Jr. "Are you ready for some football?"

Updates

No updates in two months, so I must be dead, right? Or something...

I just completed a move to New Orleans, which is sort of hanging in the balance cause I'm also navigating the paperwork jungle of the army, and actually going away for some training soon. I have about 50 blog posts with just titles, or titles and a single paragraph, some of which I don't even remember what I was going to write, and others I just want to actually be good.

But blogging is clearly not my priority, or a means of processing for me.

But soon, I will write things of worth, hopefully. And maybe even more often.

Artist ABC's

My favorite musical artists (That I actually possess in my itunes) by alphabetical alignment (some of these might surprise you)

A - Angel's & Airwaves

B - Barcelona

C - Christina Perri

D - Death Cab for Cutie

E - Explosions in the Sky

F - Foo Fighters

G - Green Day

H - Hans Zimmer

I - Iron & Wine

J - Johnny Cash

K - Kid Rock

L - Lauryn hill

M - Metallica

N - Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds

O - Oasis

P - Paramore

Q - Queen

R - Royal Crown Review

S - Smashing Pumpkins

T - Taylor Swift

U - U2

V - Viktor Mastoridis

W - The White Stripes

X - X-ecutioners

Y - Yellowcard

Z - ZZ Top

I am obviously from the 90's

Essential Functions

I'm gearing up for another Sunday and looking forward to a concert style event in which I am an audience member, and really just a consumer, so I thought about what I think are the essential functions of a church service, since I was actually privileged to perform such services in the military setting in July. That was great, but actually being in charge forced me to ask what was essential, and the reality is, it comes down to resources. The fact is there are sermons and music available to people all the time, so those aren't the vitality of the sunday event. But when people are starved for those things, it's important to bring the word, and to allow people to celebrate in song. It's also vital to get out of the lecture hall and into a dialogue. Service needs to be two ways. Time in prayer/fellowship is important. Also communion, and recognizing that the cup is really what it's all about. I'm no Catholic, but I do think that renewing communion with Christ is the central function of a gathering of believers. Ultimately what we want is a renewed and restored faith. Service's must be practical. Most of this doesn't come through to me at my sunday event, sadly, but I am willing to believe that it is dependent on my effort, and that I am not meant to be a consumer.

eHarm, superlatives, and finding out how to tell someone you care about them

I feel like I write "against" things a lot. Doesn't really matter since I have so few readers, but I hope I can generate enough interest to offend someone. But I'm not even trying to correct people when I write, it's just thoughts and attitudes that I hear in culture strike me, and boom. Blogging is born. So here we go.

So I'm dating a girl now, which might be news to two of the people that read this, it's been a fun journey the last two years since I've been actively dating, and I finally found a fun, sweet, beautiful girl that has the misfortune of liking me back, so, boom, dating. I met her through a website called "eharmony" which was an all together interesting experience. In total I think I met 20+ women from the sight and I went on a real actual date with about a dozen. I rejected or was rejected by over 1000. I want to make concessions about how some girls were really great, and the circumstances just didn't work out, but, that's more because I want to see myself as the hero. If I felt a connection with someone and didn't pursue them, then that was my decision, so it still counts, even though it wasn't an "outright" rejection.

Obviously this is kind of a "fake" way of doing things in the sense, that, if some of those women had met me in person instead of seeing my online profile, (which according to one girl who met me anyway was "not very good.") or if I had met them in person, "organicly", we would not reject each other instantly and never speak to one another. And there's probably no way based on my lifestyle that I could possibly meet or even see that many women without the assistance of a dating sight. I've never even gone to a bar to meet women. This is a flexible reality, a wormhole through which I am seeking to find a mate. And so you learn to make snap decisions based on extremely limited information, and you judge by a few pictures whether you're attracted to them.

What bothered me a LOT about the process was that the site is designed to put people into competition with one another. You can even tell by the frequency of contact, whether another person is pursuing more than one potential mate. I'm not sure if this is as much a problem for girls, but it's definitely something guys do all the time. I took a vow (I know, a "vow", it just got REAL) to not compare women to one another in my online endeavors, or really in my life. Even when I was meeting multiple girls in a weekend, I was just going to treat each person as a unique experience.

Competition and comparison are so ingrained in us as a culture, that this probably sounds weird. I wasn't going to reject one girl because she "wasn't as pretty" as another, or "I didn't have as much fun as with someone else." I think this is the root of totally objectifying women, and is not a healthy way to choose a mate. The reason I realize this now is because through my twitter and facebook account there flows a constant stream of comparative and superlative language that defines our relationships. Which in a way, is kind of insulting, because you're unconciously saying that your connection with a person is worthwhile because it's stronger than your connection with someone else. Which to me, is meaningless. I'm kind of an idealist, and kind of a pragmatist, and yes, I have arguments with myself. I'm dating the girl I'm dating now because I think she is beautiful, smart, kind, funny, and really I could go on for a while. But it literally has nothing to do with anything anyone else does or is. I like her for her. It has taken time and conscious effort to feel that way about anyone. I also think this comparative way of rating people is the reason cheating is so common.

Maybe I'm totally off, maybe when everyone uses comparative language, it's just idiomatic. One of my longstanding family jokes is every time my mom does something wonderful, even the smallest things, I tell her she's "the best." As if I could compare my mom to anyone as a mom. It has nothing to do with her being better than any one else. It's because she's MY mom. Saying "you're the best" is a joke because being the best is nowhere near good enough to describe how I feel about my mom. Superlative language is limited to the field of comparison. (Using comparative language to analyze how we rate things is ironic, so two points to you if you were able to catch me in that little self-referential snare).

I have had some weird dating experiences, and I have been (foolishly) in love with other girls. The other day I was talking to a friend who was mourning a failed attempt at love, but in the phase where he might start dating again, and we were discussing potential love interests. He told me that he thought that a couple girls were nice, but he didn't feel towards them the way he felt towards his former girlfriend. I submit that you never will feel that way again. That was a unique experience, tailored to you two as unique individuals. You'll never feel exactly the same way about two girls in your life. That's not the point of those relationships. I'll never feel about Elise how I felt towards any other girl. It's not better or worse. It's just different. And being with Elise is a wonderful, wonderful experience.

I'm not sure if this captures my thoughts exactly, typing it out before church while I'm sick and operating on 4 hours sleep. But I'll post it all the same.

An example of prophecy.

Bad Religion - 21st Century Digital Boy

Release date: September 6, 1994

Release date: March 1, 2011

The Three Doors

Recently at Church I heard the gospel presented to the unchurched (how many people are really coming to a church on sunday morning that need to hear the gospel for the first time? It's always worth it, but I still wonder)

And the key verse for the gospel presentation was Revelation 3:20.

Is this really the gospel? I completely affirm this as communion with Christ, but I'm not sure that this communicates anything about the gospel standing alone. This sounds suspiciously like the "pray a prayer and ask Jesus into your heart" motif of the Southern Baptist movement, and I may not see eye to eye on everything with him, but Rev. Paul Washer does a pretty good job of debunking this as the gospel, if you haven't already heard that. Pretty crazy sermon.

Personally, I like studying the bible as literature, I'm no liberal (in the literary critical sense; I don't really have a side in politics) but I think it's an important school of thought. And in the Bible this 'door' motif actually comes up a few times.

In revelation, the surrounding verses seem to talk mainly to people who are already saved, or at least in churches, and Specifically, who are struggling with worldliness. v. 19 and 21 seem to point to renewing faith, and the perseverance and good works of the saints. Opening the door is the Gospel in deeds, not in word.

Jesus has mentioned the door in the sermon on the mount, but in that instance, he talks about seeking relationship with God, and calls others to "knock, and the door shall be opened to you". So there is a reversal, where we must seek God's kingdom. This is the gospel in Word, seeking the true Word of Truth, the one true God.

The door comes up a third time in the gospel of John, where instead of anyone knocking, Jesus declares "I AM the door" and only through him may anyone be saved. This is the gospel in power, the safe passage of the undeserving into paradise. It is our spiritual protection and the initiation of trust. (The hebrew word for believe is the same word for trust) The only way to the Father is through Jesus Christ. This is particularly noteworthy 6 chapters later when Jesus literally stands between his disciples and a cohort of roman soldiers in the garden of Gethsemane.

I love my church (this was the same sunday I became a member), and I don't mean to be overly critical, but, I want to look at the Bible and at life holistically, and I'm not sure that "opening the door and letting Jesus in" really communicates salvation by grace through faith resulting in a redeemed life. It definitely grabs onto the relationship aspect, but out of context, I just wonder what kind of impact the literal word actually has. The Gospel travels in Word, Deed, & Power. I myself am humbled by this, and need to be refreshed in it constantly.

Stay Gold

Well, it's oscar time, I have to comment at length.

Best Picture: Black Swan

I'm already a huge Arinofsky fan (The Fountain is one of the most aesthetically exquisite movies ever) and I really hope we go with the controversial pick. This movie had me jumping, and if you know me at all, you know I don't jump in movies.

Best Actor: James Franco

Franco is captivating in 127 Hours, I have extremely high expectations of Danny Boyle movies, and Franco really outdid them in his own self-contained performance. However, I think the Academy will pick Javier Bardem, since he's not even in an american picture and he's nominated for the award, and really, they've wanted to reward him ever since The Sea Inside. Beware the retroactive oscar.

Best Actress: Natalie Portman

I'm not sure if she'll win this round because of the older gals she's competing with, but she surely will win someday, and she totally undid her image in Black Swan. By the end of the movie, I could only see Nina.

Best Supporting Actor: Christian Bale

Wow. I was blown away by his performance. He makes everyone in the movie better.

Best Supporting Actress: Haley Steinfeld

How is she not up for best actress? Loved this movie, and she works it.

Best Animated Feature: Toy Story 3

If it's up for best picture, does it even need to be a question? I didn't see any of the other nominees. Also, why wasn't Tangled nominated?

Best Art Direction: Alice in Wonderland

Not much for story, but the aesthetic of this movie was dizzyingly good.

Best Cinematography: Inception

I loved the framing and shot selection of this movie. Without using digital film alteration, they made such clear distinctions between dream and reality. Not sure why people had so much trouble following it.

Costume: Alice in Wonderland

Again, the way everything that's real works together in this movie is fantastic, but the story and acting and other things really diminished a flawless aesthetic.

Best Director: Darin Arinofsky

This is THE Arinofsky picture. He has shown his mastery with lesser actors and stories, and this is the story and picture that bring it all together for him to shine as the story teller.

Best Editing: 127 Hours

This leaps off the screen from the very outset

Best Makeup: The Wolfman

I kinda forgot about this picture, but it was fantastic for what it was.

Music: Inception

I just loved this score, I have a feeling they might go with 127 hours; A.R. Rahman is such a standout from the field, but I didn't feel he accomplished quite what he did with Slumdog Millionaire, and Zimmer outdid his work on Pirates for this one.

Song: Tangled

I want this movie to be rewarded.

Sound Editing: Tron Legacy

I think this one is much more involved than any of the other nominees.

Sound Mixing: Inception

As with the Cinematography, they distinguish 4 seperate realities, yet present a unified vision and film. Very excellent work.

Visual Effects: Inception

I downplayed my reaction to this movie, but it really is dazzling, especially everything you notice on the second viewing.

Adapted Screenplay: 127 Hours

This is probably one of the most challenging stories to bring to life on the screen, and it's written very well, exploring so many facets of humanity. I have a feeling they will choose The Social Network, because it's a media darling and what else could it possibly win for? Still uncertain why people liked this disjointed teen drama.

Original Screenplay: The Kings Speech

Everyone's raving about this movie (I haven't seen it) and I haven't really given it a chance in any other category, so I figure it has to win something.

OKAY, I have commented in the past about my personal distinction between BEST and FAVORITE. These are all in the BEST category, but I usually pick something else for my favorite movie of the year, and honestly, my favorite movie that I saw this year was, well, The Runaways. I thought it was great. It gets the Golden Mattyo. Also a total breakout performance for Dakota Fanning. Looking forward to her acting as an adult.

Final Scores

Inception: 4

Black Swan: 3

127 Hours: 3

Alice in Wonderland: 2

1 Each: The Fighter, True Grit, Toy Story 3, Tangled, Tron: Legacy, The Kings Speech

Clueless

I have no idea who's reading this. Please leave a comment if you do.

NFL Grace - The Seahawks

The Seahawks are losers. Losers who have made a habit of losing. They lose more than they win. And yet now they have won the biggest playoff upset in history. Winning is not a happenstance, it takes pure and clear intention. But there is an infusion of grace (sometimes referred to as fate or dumb luck, the residue of hardwork and preparation) in every victory, every bounce of the ball, and while I'm not going to tell you that God cares about the outcomes of sports, or that we should in any way take the sports team to God in prayer specifically for a W. I will tell you that God cares about people, and these sports teams and athletes are people that have a distinct disadvantage at getting into heaven according to Jesus. And so maybe the outcomes of their games play into their stories. Maybe they make up pictures that will connote a spark of the divine, a graceful intention, and the fact that when you're a loser and you don't deserve a chance, grace can intervene and you can win.

My Mini Mega Church & Mission

So My Church started a new series entitled "Missional Life" and while it's a great idea, and a great series to go through, there are definitely certain things missing that you couldn't really say in a mini mega church like mine. Like the whole living in community beyond the church, not being attractional, and the missional movement as a reaction to traditional christendom.

When I go to church, I think of three youtube videos, every sunday something like this happens.

This is so true, Sunday morning is an event, not a community, so people are just gonna feel awkward there.

This is just a hilarious depiction that is so true of the sunday morning event.

I've never visited the youth group, but I bet it's a little like this.

Don't get me wrong, I've really enjoyed my time at Bethany Baptist Church, but it's a very traditional-contemporary church, so to truly engage in mission is a big stretch for all of us there. I'm very interested to see what the results of this series will be in the life of the community.

Today's Lesson

Wisdom

Understanding

Knowledge

Information

Data

Start at the bottom and work your way up.